Some of us are as uncomfortable receiving compliments as we are receiving criticisms. Some of us find it even more difficult to accept compliments than criticism. We find ourselves discounting the compliment in some way. To avoid appearing conceited or self-centered, we might think we should discredit the compliment.
In reality, discounting a compliment is an insult not only to ourselves but also to the person giving it. Do any of these sound familiar?
Oh, it was really nothing.
It wasn’t that good. I messed up in several places.
This thing? It’s so old.
If you knew the truth, you wouldn’t think it was so great.
Well, thanks but _________ (you fill in the blank!)
Each of these comments is a subtle way of telling the person that they don’t know what they are talking about and are wrong.
When we have low self-esteem or a negative self-image and we hear a message that contradicts that image, the message is difficult to accept so we reject it. The person that gives the compliment can feel shut down.
An effective strategy for accepting compliments is to remember that we are loveable and worthy. Accepting a complimnt acknowledges both ourselves and the person giving it. A simple way to accept a compliement is to say,” Thank you. I appreciate that.”
A compliment is a gift from the person saying it and to ourselves. Give yourself the gift if a compliment. You deserve it.
Believe In Yourself,