Food: Your Past and Now
Whether we are considering weight loss surgery, pre-op or post-op, we tend to think of our issues with food as negative and wish they’d never started in our lives.
What about this…..At some point in your life, usually as a child, we turned to food for a reason. It served a purpose in our lives. Food helped us in some reason to cope or survive a situation that we didn’t have the skills or cognitive ability to deal with ourselves.
For me, food definitely served a purpose. As difficult as it is to admit here with whomever is reading this, to some degree I was the black sheep of my family. I’ve always been more insightful and had a need to know and understand my circumstances and also myself. I had a toxic family environment and for a child that has a need to understand, blowing the appearance of the perfect family doesn’t work. On the outside, the appearance was that everything was just perfect. Inside the family, it was far from it. When the two didn’t quite gel, I asked questions to understand. Not only wasn’t is appreciated as to my curiousity and desire to understand, it was rejected as was I.
It was as though I was a square peg that was pounded to fit into a smaller circle. It didn’t work at all and the pounding on me to fit into that small circle of my family caused me to turn to food. I turned to food to turn off my confusion, rejection, need for love and acceptance for who I was-different from them. I also turned to food to squelch who I really was in an attempt to fit in and be like they were. At the time, squelching who I was and surviving my toxic surroundings, worked for me. It helpd me get through.
As an adult, I never ditched that mode of using food to live my life. Hey, it worked for me earlier in my life, I knew nothing else. As we all know, problem is that turning to food like I did to survive as a child no longer worked and was truly no longer necessary. The problem was made worse because it resulted in becoming morbidly obese. Food no longer worked the way it used to as a little girl and was not necessary. I was free and living on my own as an adult but I still was squelched by the hold food had on my life.
After having surgery and working with my own coach, I’ve come to realize all of this. I’ve developed other ways to cope with life and my emotions rather than squelch myself with food. I’ve also come to appreciate and understand the purpose food has played in my life as a little girl and also that I no longer need food as it doesn’t serve the purpose it did. I’ve created my own way and in the process truly learned to love and appreciate those qualities that were hated and rejected as a child.
I think we were very brilliant to turn to food when our surroundings were unbearable to us so we could cope and live. Now, we are still equally brilliant and see that we no longer need to use food and that it no longer serves a purpose for us now as adults.
Change your relationship with food from your past and you will change your life now and your future.
Believe In Yourself,
Cathy, CLC
Certified Life Coach, Weight Loss Surgery Coach
Certified Back On Track Facilitator